Thursday, March 10, 2011

Wal-Mart Wine

My buddy Windy in San Francisco sent this to me today.  Normally I seldom mention my friends cos they're private and not so web-social.  This cracked me up given my current mood about Corporatism and Government, it was so apt.

Wal-Mart announced that sometime in 2011 it will begin offering
 customers a new discount item... Wal-Mart's own brand of wine.

 The world's largest retail chain is rumored to be teaming up with
 Ernest & Julio Gallo Winery of California to produce the spirits at
 an affordable price in the $2 to $5 range.

 Wine connoisseurs may not be inclined to put a bottle of the Wal-
 Mart brand into their shopping carts, but 'There is a market for
 inexpensive wine,' said Kathy Micken, professor of marketing at
 University   of  Arkansas , Bentonville. 'However, branding will be
 very important.'

 Customer surveys were conducted to determine the most attractive
 name for the Wal-Mart wine brands and varieties.

 The top surveyed names in order of popularity were:

 10. Chateau Traileur Parc
 9. White Trashfindel
 8. Big Red Gulp
 7. World Championship Riesling
 6. NASCARbernet
 5. Chef Boyardeaux
 4. Pinot Newt
 3. I Can't Believe it's not Vinegar
 2. Grape Expectations
 1. Nasti Spumante

 The beauty of Wal-Mart wine is that it can be served with either
 white meat (Possum) or red meat (Squirrel).

1 comment:

The Hag said...

Ahhhh... great laugh!