I don't know about blowing this blog up. I haven't posted a damn thing since 2017. It's 2021. I've had friends die in the interval. After 8 years of illness, my husband died of COPD on the 5th of March 2021.
This is within the first month of widowhood and I'm still in the process of dealing with the bureaucratic aspects of a person dying. I know it it sounds bloodless. It's not. I took care of my wonderful partner and, at the end, was with him when he died in my arms, holding my hands. I don't know how to unpack those years. Yet.